Me and My (Older) Man

Okay, I have a little confession to make…I dig older men.

I love and admire older men like Gordon Parks, Ossie Davis, Barack Obama, Melvin Van Peebles and John H. Johnson. Their individual stories of struggle and success, their creative and innovative minds, and most importantly their dedication to their families remind me of one older man that I absolutely adore: my dad.

I fell head over heels in love with my dad the first time I laid eyes on him that fateful Sunday morning back in 1986. A slender brown-skinned specimen with long, wavy hair and big, bright brown eyes (just like mine!), I knew from that moment on that we would be inseparable. His intelligence intrigues me. His self confidence amazes me. The unconditional love & adoration he has for me humbles this self-professed grown woman into the little girl I remember who snuck and slept by the front door…on the floor… awaiting her daddy’s return home from work.

I remember when my mom found out about my secret sleeping arrangements. She had a fit. My dad explained to her that he knew I was sleeping behind the door so he would open it slow enough to nudge me awake...this would then prompt me to get up so he could open the door completely. My mom tried to stop me. It didn’t work. I was determined to be the first person to see my dad when he stepped through that door. After a number of failed attempts (and probably a little crying on my part), she gave me a pillow and a blanket and left the situation alone. Eventually I grew out of sleeping by the door, but even now when I’m back at home I can’t sleep unless I know that my dad is in the house with me.

We’ve shared many fond memories, my daddy and me. And now that I think about it...all of those memories involve him teaching me something: how to read, how to wash clothes, how to tell time, how to write a poem, how to check out books from the library (and how to pay late fees), how to ride a bike, how to build a diorama, how to drive (even though I almost clipped a postman and ran into him!), how to check my oil, how to use a tire gauge, how to fix my toilet when it’s making that ‘whirring’ sound, how to deal with difficult situations in the workplace and the list goes on and on.

He’s a cool guy, my dad. The essence of cool I think; more than worthy of an Ebony cover in honor of his coolness. He has his own style…his own swagger…that which inspires me to define and embrace my own. I’m blessed to have him in my life as the prototype of what a man/husband/father should be, and appreciate all of the other men out there who are striving to be the same for their families.

In closing, don't forget to celebrate our fathers and father figures this upcoming holiday and everyday for that matter! There are men out here working hard to do and be the best that they can and they deserve a pat on the back every once in a while. Ya’ dig?